There was also a very assuring presence that I cannot explain. It was as if I was surrounded by a halo of warmth. I knew in my heart that this was God even though I could not explain His presence. He came to reveal something to me and I was being prepared by His spirit. At the back of my mind a lot of thoughts were running like bullets fired from a machine gun and I was trying hard to rationalize this to some natural experience but my heart rejected all those thoughts and just kept telling me that God had come. When such things happen to you, you wish that you were Samuel and that Eli the priest was there to guide you through it all. But when it is you and God alone it’s totally different. This experience became the foundation on which my boldness was built.
After reading the Psalm through about four times I was ready to leave. I was using the train to go to work because when I got saved I gave away my car and I was still waiting on God to give me another one. As soon as I opened the door I felt the most frightening, hair raising demonic presence I have felt so far in my life. I could not bring myself to leaving home. In the meantime the voice inside my stomach was still incessantly revising Psalm 91, especially the last verse. It was at that time that I knew I was facing trouble. I tried to pray but all I could say was; with long life you will satisfy me and show me your salvation, with long life you will satisfy me and show me your salvation, with long life you will satisfy me and show me your salvation. This went on and on if it was never going to end.
I finally managed to leave home still engulfed by this new horrid feeling. When I walked out into the street I soon realized that I was walking alone because it was Saturday and most people were home. My footsteps were exaggeratedly louder than every other day and the dogs were barking as if they were seeing or hearing something for the very first time. I kept glancing behind me expecting something out of a horror movie to appear right there from the darkness. The train station was about just over a kilometre away from home and it usually took me about 15 minutes to get there, but that day it felt like an endless pilgrimage into nowhere. The more I walked the more it felt like I was heading to the belly of hell itself. I felt like screaming or running just so that I could announce my presence to whatever was awaiting me out the in the dark, because at that time it was loud and clear that things were not working in my favour. It was like I was being led to the slaughter.
I finally reached a very dark passage about 300 meters from the station. This passage was not actually the kind of place I had to go through in that state because a week ago I stumbled over a dead person in the middle of it. Criminals frequently robbed and killed the most unfortunate people in the same passage from time to time. By this time I was almost shouting the Psalm out loud enough so that whoever was out there must hear that I was not going to die quietly. If I was going to die I was going to do it loud enough.
I was overcome by a great desperation. The kind that makes you want to scream and beat your head against a hard object.
As I entered the passage as if appearing from nowhere a man jumped in front of me and grabbed me by my collar. He had a huge knife that glittered in the dark. We looked each other in the face and no one said anything for a while. I noticed that he was not alone, there was another one standing to my right with what looked like a gun. There was not much light in that dark passage so my vision was quite vague, but I saw the knife vividly. After what seemed like forever I finally spoke and said; In Jesus’ name. The man responded by saying I want money! Again I said in Jesus’ name and once more he responded by saying I want money!
This went on over and over again as if we were trying to see who was going to give in first. Then I said I don’t have any money for you, all I have is the name of Jesus. The man began to cry but still holding onto my collar and still said he wanted money only this time it was mixed with crying. We went through another circle of demand and denial of money. By this time I discovered that all the fear I felt was substituted by such a powerful wave of boldness that just oozed from deep within my soul.
All this time the other guy just stood there as if he just came to witness the whole thing. He never said a word through this whole ordeal. What I witnessed that morning will forever remind me of the goodness of God. Verses 11 and 12 of Psalm 91 say “For He (God) shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways. In their hands they shall bear you up, Lest you dash your foot against a stone” KJV (Emphasis mine)
Here we were with me trusting in God and proclaiming His unfailing word and my ‘supposed to be’ robber with tears running down his face and hanging onto my collar and crying for money that I already told him that he cannot have. This guy continued crying and demanding that I give him money, and I refused in Jesus’ name. He finally let go off me and I continued to rebuke him in the name of Jesus. Every time I mentioned the name of Jesus both these guys would take a few steps backwards as if they were being driven by some force. At last they turned and ran away so fast I thought that someone had come to my rescue. I stood there in the middle of the valley of the shadow of death and there was no one else except myself. I looked around hoping to see another person but none was there. I knelt down and lifted my hands towards heaven thanking God for protecting me from obvious death.
The whole thing took less than three minutes and I realized that is how much it takes for one to enter into eternity. As I stood up I remembered that I made a deal with God that should he protect me openly I will let go off my gun and trust Him. But was I truly ready to do that? Did God really protect me today? Was He preparing me for this through that voice that was reciting the Psalm? Or was this jus a twist of fate? I was not fully convinced I needed more proof. I said to God “Just show me another act of protection then I will know it’s you” He never said a word. To be continued. MVK